We need to let go of what we don’t need - in order to make room for what we do need.
Achieving a state of inner peace requires intentional action. It takes living in this moment to experience a calm acceptance of what is. It is important to release unhealthy reactions to what is. Of all the unhealthy reactions, perhaps the most damaging reaction is fear. However, blaming, selfishness, and anger are all reactions which may cause misery; these are reactions we must let go. That is, we must let them go if we are to experience deep peace.
Furthermore, letting go of harsh self-talk makes way for us to have more realistic and positive self-talk. Turning harsh self-talk into healthy self-talk involves our conscious awareness. Part of this awareness is to realize we do not have to believe everything we think. An unhealthy way of functioning is believing self-talk which belittles us and, frankly, lies to us. Thoughts such as "I am afraid to change, so I’m not going try" are damaging and untrue.
While letting go of unhealthy reactions and negative self-talk is critical for inner peace, there are other things we must hold fast. There is laughter, for instance. Laughter is essential to personal life satisfaction. It lightens all burdens. And laughter is known to be a curative factor as it relieves stress and contributes to physical wellbeing.
Good relationships further contribute to inner peace. Making a personal commitment to being a kind and loving person serves us well. Let us promote reciprocal affirmation, attention and affection.
Also we must embrace acceptance. Acceptance tends to grow as we gain a more mature perspective. Acceptance means living in this moment as it is; even if this moment is not what we bargained for. Acceptance demands we throw out the powerful need to control our life. Acceptance helps us to be emotionally stable and humble. There is a deep relief which comes about when we accept what is without ratcheting ourselves up to try to change what is not ours to change.
Trust plays a role, too. Trust calms us with thoughts of positive and probable outcomes. This promotes the courage to face what needs to be faced with integrity and acceptance.
Doing all this therapeutic work to break out of our own prison is well worth our invaluable inner peace.
Mary Seyuin, M.A. LLP
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